has happened especially the last 5 weeks. We have finally decided
to hired a helper, in other words a maid. And, we spent the last
5 weeks, or at least myself tossing in my bed at nite wondering
and questioning our decisions. It is not easy. I have been working
so hard at work and at home for the past 11 mths or so such that
i dun have to come to this decision. But, what can i say? It's damn
exhausting. Anyway, once we have decided, there's 1001 things to
do. First, we have to "dismantle" our lab such that our
helper have a place to sleep. EM will never ever let a stranger
sleep with his computer! And, i will never ever let a stranger sleep
with Ken in his room. So, after much arguing, the computers land
themselves in our living room. I think we almost spent 3 nites just
to move the computers out! There are tonnes of wires and not to
mention the printer, the scanner, the broadband modem, the fax modem,
the speakers, the subwoofers, etc, etc.. aiyo!! The worst are the
2 metal cabinets! Imagine all the barang-barang inside which we
have to take out, bring the metal cabinet out and put all the things
back! And, throughout the process we must be as silent as possible
lest the lil' Kong Long wakes up!
which, we have to "furnished" our helper's room. And,
me rehearsing my lines over and over again on what to tell Ken's
nanny! Here's a pic of her.
buckets on the last day of Ken's nanny! It's so sad especially when
she do such a good job for us. Well, we have to move on. Now, we
have tested out for one week. Ken seems to be okie with our helper,
J. He can laughs at her, willing to let her carry, etc. So, one
way, i feel less worried for now. We shall see how it goes.
in between we went back to celebrate my dad's 70th birthday. Here's
a pic of my family.
In the bfg forum i frequent, we were talking abt ending our "pumping
career". I thot perhaps i shd take a pic before my pumping
barang go into retirement state. As for now, i have not yet make
up my mind when that will be.
a more crazy note, we went to buy a chest freezer to store my EBM
(expressed breast milk). So here's to see how my freezer looks like
thruout my pumping career til now. Chest freezer cannot take much
of a picture anymore. The former is when i still have not store
neatly and later i stored it more neatly as seen in the latter photo.
realised that there's only one thing i do well for Ken. That is
to b'feed him. Other than this, i really question my decisions/ways
everyday. Did i stimulate him enuf? Do i provide him with enough
love? Do i talk to him enough? Do i feed him well? Is porridge everyday
harming him? Am i denying him of any chance? Aiyo.. having a child
is like a guilt trap. So, do i still want another? Yes. but maybe
not so soon. Lemme have some normalcy back in my life first!